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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29695692">Just One Hit of you, I Knew ill Never Be the Same</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/stylinsexualxo/pseuds/stylinsexualxo'>stylinsexualxo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>One Direction (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Louis Tomlinson, Closeted Character, Closeted Harry, Endgame Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Falling In Love, First Time, Forbidden Love, Gay Sex, Grinding, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Harry and Xander had a thing for like five seconds in the past, Infidelity, M/M, Masturbation, Nanny Louis Tomlinson, Oral Sex, Parent-Child Relationship, Producer Harry Styles, Rough Sex, Spanking, Top Harry Styles, Workplace Relationship, the music industry sucks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 02:47:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>21,176</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29695692</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/stylinsexualxo/pseuds/stylinsexualxo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The au where Harry is a 23 year old married, music industry workaholic who isn't satisfied with where his life has taken him and Louis is the new 18 year old live in nanny from humble surroundings who takes care of his 6 year old daughter and turns his life upside down.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Original Male Character(s), Kendall Jenner/Harry Styles, Niall Horan/Zayn Malik, past Harry Styles/Xander Ritz</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>67</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So hello, here we are again. I am trying my hand at another chaptered fic. </p><p>I will tell you it took me a while to find the motivation to even start this but this idea has been floating around in my head ever since I finished Crash &amp; Rebuild. I just never really know where to take my fics anymore which is why I was writing one shots based on stuff that happened in the larry fandom for a while.</p><p>All that said, i'm hoping this goes over well. I will at least try to update faster than I did with C&amp;R. </p><p>The title is inspired by Camila Cabello's song Never Be the Same.</p><p>Enjoy xo</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He needed a job. He really, really did.</p><p>Louis was sat on his porch, thumbing through a local newspaper, skimming over the ads for jobs he could manage with his newly freed schedule. He felt a little guilty having decided to take a gap year and put more pressure on his mum, Jay when she was already supporting the girls.</p><p>He had a feeling she would have at least liked him to do something with his life other than sitting around, so a job was the most logical solution. His friends had all gone off to Uni but Zayn had stayed close so they still got to communicate regularly.</p><p>"Speak of the devil and he shall appear." Louis stated, watching his best mate saunter up the sidewalk, clothes dishelveled as if they'd spent the night on someone's floor. They probably had.</p><p>Zayn's eyebrow lifted as he approached up the narrow stone path. "You realize that made no sense, yeah? You weren't talking."</p><p>Louis shook his head, folding the newspaper back up and setting it down on the wooden step next to him. "My dear Zayn, always so literal. I was thinking about you at least."</p><p>"I don't know if I want to be in your sordid little brain anyway." He chuckled, taking a seat next to Louis, the old wood creaking underneath his weight . "What are you doing with that?"</p><p>He lifted the paper, twirling it around in his hands. "Ah, I wanted to get a job. The least I can do if i'm sponging off my mum for another year is help her pay for some stuff."</p><p>Zayn scoffed. "Your mum would let you commit murder and still love the fuck out of you so I don't know what you're talking about."</p><p>It was true. Being her first born and all it was obvious she had a soft spot for him. They had something of a special bond which he treasured very much. He wasn't sure where he would be now or really what he would have done if it wasn't for her understanding and love in every situation he faced. Most noteably when he'd come out to her in sixth form. </p><p>When he'd gotten in trouble the few times he'd snuck out of the house or let a swear word slip around the girls, the most she would give him is a stern talking to or a dirty glance but then they were good as new. She had forgotten about it by the time dinner was through. He was lucky, really.</p><p>It caused a little trouble with his siblings when he got away with things but he couldn't really be arsed to care.</p><p>"I just want to be able to help out. She's gotta take care of Lots, Fiz, Daisy, and Phoebe by herself. I am the man of the house after all."</p><p>He heard Zayn chuckle beside him and felt their shoulders colide as he sent him an amused grin. The quaffed male lit up a cigarette and took a long puff before speaking.</p><p>"The fifties called, they want jurrasic way of thinking back."</p><p>Louis groaned and fell backwards, the back of his head thudding on the hardwood underneath him. He brought a hand to his head and rubbed it, grimacing.</p><p>"Okay well what about that girl Perrie? She was working at this posh place as a nanny for this famous couple and she needs someone to take her spot before she goes abroad." Zayn suggested. "You're great with kids."</p><p>"A famous couple?" Louis replied, skeptically. "How famous are we talking? Like world famous or small town famous?"</p><p>Zayn rolled his eyes, pushing at his mate's knee, annoyed."What the hell does it matter, Louis? Its a job and you'd be good at it. Don't be a snob."</p><p>Louis pondered it for a moment before he dug his phone out of his pocket, dialing a number. When the person on the other end answered, his face brightened.</p><p>"Pez! My lady love! I have a bit of a favor to ask."</p><p>-----------</p><p>Perrie had texted him an address and time soon after they'd hung up and now here he stood two days later outside a huge house it had taken him half an hour to bike to.</p><p>It was in some fancy neighborhood on the other side of town and it soon became abundantly clear to him that these people were very, very rich. Of course that should have been obvious from the start.  However, being around rich people had always made Louis a little insecure and nervous.</p><p>Its not like he was ashamed of where he came from but he was well aware they were working class and from all his experiences with rich people in school and beyond, they were all self obsessed, condecending jerks. If he didn't have the nicest clothes or the newest cell phone rotting his brain with radio waves or whatever that one conspiracy said, he wasn't worthy of a glance in his direction.</p><p>Louis didn't wanna say he was bias but well, could you blame him?</p><p>Eventually he made his way to the mohogany door, having an internal debate about whether to knock or ring the doorbell. He was so out of his element.</p><p>With shaking hands, he leaned over, pressing his index finger against the button. A cheerful little melody rang out as he waited with his hands shoved in his pockets.</p><p>When the door swung open, a woman gave him an odd look, surveying his appearance. He would kill Zayn for telling him to stick with casual dress. Noticing the broom in her hands, Louis finally figured out it was the maid, his face coloring a bit.</p><p>"Uh, i'm here to see Kendall?" He said, tripping over his own feet as the maid ushered him inside.</p><p>"Ms. Jenner will be with you in a moment. She's just with Cassie upstairs trying to wrestle her into a bath." She replied, a soft smile flickering across her face before returning back to normal. "Have a seat, love. I'm sure you won't have to wait long."</p><p>Louis nodded, moving towards the huge, open living room. It was nice and bright, with cream colored walls and modern, trendy furnishings. It was only separated from the rest of the house by a partial wall, a long, black sectional couch pushed up against it, wrapping around half the room. Behind the wall, there was a fairly simple dining room that unsurprisingly looked like it had never been used and a set of stairs that lead upstairs to where he assumed the bedrooms and bathrooms were.</p><p>There were a few closed doors on either side of the staircase, one swinging door he assumed was the kitchen and the others he had no idea what they could be used for. Probably rooms for things rich people needed them for. Studies, office areas. All that rubbish.</p><p>He rubbed his hands over his jeans, his palms having gone a little sweaty with every step he took into the house. Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long.</p><p>"Louis. I'm sorry to make you wait."</p><p>At the sound of his name, he shot up to his feet, turning towards the stairs, momentarily unable to move forward. The woman moving down the stairs was definitely a model. She had long brunette hair, he was convinced some of them might have been extensions but that didn't really matter. Her clothes were expensive, as if she'd just walked off of a runway and pearls resting upon her tanned skin. No doubt a fake tan but he had to room to judge. Her heels made clicking sounds against the marble of the entryway as she approached him.</p><p>When she leaned forward to shake his hand, he noticed the huge diamond on her ring finger.</p><p>"I'm Kendall." She continued, smiling, and shaking his hand when he held it out weakly. "Lets go sit in the kitchen and talk."</p><p>She motioned him towards the door he had suspected as the kitchen, immediately immersed in black marble, white cupboards, and sterling silver appliances. Louis took a seat on one of the stools in front of the island, watching Kendall do the same on the other side of him.</p><p>"So, you're here for the nanny position? Do you have any experience?" She placed her manicured hands one on top of the other, instantly switching into business mode.</p><p>Louis blinked at the sudden change of pace. "Um. Yeah I am. I have a lot of experience, I have a huge family. Five sisters and one brother, all younger. I like to think I can handle anything."</p><p>Kendall seemed surprised but by what, he had no idea. Perhaps they hadn't had a male nanny that was quite as qualified ever. Or maybe it was his amount of siblings that had surprised her. Whenever he told people, he seemed to get shocked responses across the board.</p><p>"I would say you seem to be about our best option. How soon can you move in?"</p><p>Louis froze, his mouth opening and closing a few times before closing completely. "Move in?"</p><p>Kendall seemed confused by his response, her forehead wrinkling slightly. "Didn't Perrie tell you that this was a live in job? I wouldn't be surprised if she'd forgotten that little detail."</p><p>Louis huffed out a laugh. "No she didn't- It wasn't mentioned."</p><p>Living here with people he barely knew? While it would be a fun experience, how could he leave his mum all alone? What would she do with the kids? His guilt would eat him alive but it seemed like a great opportunity to make some good money.</p><p>"Its okay if you can't. I suppose i'll have to search for another option."</p><p>Louis shook his head quickly. "No. Its okay I can talk it over with my mum and see if its possible. Give me a day."</p><p>The woman regarded him for a moment as if she was trying to decide whether he was worth wasting all this time for. It felt like she was scanning him with her eyes, x-raying every single part of him that would determine whether she should wait. Whether she should give him a chance.</p><p>Finally, when she smiled, Louis' tension seemed to ease away.</p><p>"Okay, fine. Go home and talk to her and if you can, bring your stuff tomorrow and I will introduce you to Cassie. Let you get to know her a little." Kendall moved around the counter, approaching him slowly, her arm sliding around his shoulders as they walked back out to the entryway. "I would say I would introduce you to my husband, Harry but he'll probably be in the studio for a while."</p><p>Louis nodded, taking in all the new information that had just been deposited in his brain. Cassie was the little girl's name that he'd be taking care of. Also, Kendall's husband was named Harry and he was either a music producer, a songwriter, a singer, or a combination of the three. He felt bad about his first reaction to hearing his name, immediately thinking he might be a decade or two older than her with tons of money she was living off of.</p><p>It was very clear that she made her own money if the covers and model stills framed around the house were anything to go by but he couldn't help that his brain was prone to stereotypes. And Harry sounded like a seventy year old with a floral shirt. Might as well call him Harold.</p><p>"I'll let you know how the talk with my mum goes either way." He said, inching closer to the front door, his hand on the handle.</p><p>"Yes please do. I'll speak to you tomorrow, Louis." She grinned and waved him off, standing in the doorway for a few moments before the door swung shut again.</p><p>Louis exhaled a large breath he wasn't even aware he was holding in. Maybe it was how stuffy he found fancier houses. Like if you breathed too hard, you would ruin something.</p><p>Grabbing his bike, he mounted it and made the long trek home. By the time he got home, mum should be there making dinner. He had no idea how to even begin to ask her to let him live with some random rich family to be able to take care of their child. He had to word it in the right way.</p><p>Either way he was determined to get this job.</p><p>---------------</p><p>When Louis got home, he dumped his bike in the yard, not really too concerned about it getting stolen, and walked into his house. He found his mum doing exacty as he expected. Rushing around the kitchen, preparing dinner.</p><p>He kissed Daisy and Phoebe on the head while they did their crafts at the table and approached his mum slowly.</p><p>"I need to talk to you later if that's possible."</p><p>She smiled at him, pressing a hand to his cheek. "Always have time for you, love. What's it about?"</p><p>Louis slowed his steps, shrugging. "I got a job. I just need to go over it with you."</p><p>When he heard the clatter of silverware in the sink, he knew he was in for a lecture. See, his mum wasn't against him having a job but she wanted him to do it for the right reasons and apparently helping her support the girls wasn't on the list of reasons she accepted.</p><p>With him having just turned eighteen, she wanted him to experience life, not worry about them but they were his family, how could he not worry?</p><p>Louis held up his hand to pause her before she could start speaking. "I know what you're going to say and it doesn't matter. I want to help. I'm not being forced. I care about you and them having everything you need."</p><p>"Its not your responsibility."</p><p>"Its not yours, either. Not entirely. The sperm donors can shoulder some expenses as well, can't they?" He replied, crossing his arms over his chest.</p><p>Jay shook her head, sighing. "Louis-"</p><p>"Mum. You're not going to win this one and that's all they are so don't bother trying to get me to call them any different."</p><p>Louis didn't exactly have the best relationships with the father figures of the family. His own father left when he was just a toddler and Mark, as nice as he was, even supplying him with a new name, he left too. There wasn't a man that was very dependable that had ever been in their lives. It may have had more of an effect on Louis that he would care to admit, his sadness turning to anger over time.</p><p>Jay sighed again, shooing the twins off to go wash their hands before dinner, pulling out a chair, and taking a seat. She nodded for him to do the same and placed the towel in her tight grip onto the table.</p><p>"So what is this job then?"</p><p>Louis inhaled deeply, exhaling just as deeply to calm his nerves. "Please don't freak out. I think this could be a really good opportunity for me."</p><p>She chuckled, shaking her head. "That's a great start. No way will I be worried now."</p><p>"Mum." He chided, rolling his eyes. "Okay, so I have the opportunity to be a nanny for a really nice family. They're sort of rich. The one stipulation to this is that I would move in with them, not just be temporary."</p><p>Jay scoffed, looking at him as if he'd grown two heads. "You want me to just let you go off and live with some family I dont know to take care of their child? You don't see how this was crazy to ask for?"</p><p>"I do know, I just- I don't know. Its something new. I would send you money every week." He stuttered.</p><p>"You will not."</p><p>Louis rolled his eyes again, plopping back against his chair. "Why must you be so difficult? I would feel bad about leaving you and the girls. Of course i'm going to send money."</p><p>When Jay didn't speak, he continued. "The only thing we would have to figure out is who is gonna watch them while you work?"</p><p>"Do you really want this?" She asked, staring deep into his eyes, trying to get a read on just how much he was passionate about doing this.</p><p>He had a love/hate relationship with the fact that she actually thought she had to analyze if he was going to stick to this. He tried not to feel mildly offended. She was just being protective, after all.</p><p>Louis nodded slowly. "Yeah. I really do. I think maybe this, getting out of the house and having new expereiences will  allow me time to figure my life out. At least, it might help a bit, anyway."</p><p>He put as much conviction and passion as could be laced in such a confirmation and it made Jay shrug.</p><p>"Well, I guess you can then. You're an adult now and I trust your choices. Don't worry about the kids, Lottie can take over babysitting duty."</p><p>He chuckled. "She'll love that."</p><p>She returned his laugh, standing up to serve dinner after calling for the rest of the kids."She'll just have to get over it, I suppose. While her brother is off being an independent man."</p><p>-------------</p><p>Louis had asked Zayn to help him move into his new home, vaguely excited to be going somewhere new though he still felt guilty for leaving his mum.</p><p>Lottie hadn't taken it too well either with all the new responsibility she gained overnight. She gave him about five or six dirty looks as he piled what little he owned that he could take and himself into Zayn's little beat up car to start his new life.</p><p>"Are you excited then?" Zayn asked him as he drove, his free hand dangling out the open window, cigarette tucked carefully between his fingers.</p><p>He was really glad it was spring, he'd be freezing by now otherwise. Nothing got in the way of this man and his nasty habits.</p><p>Louis shrugged. "Its a new experience, so yeah. Bit nervous though. I mean, what if Cassie doesn't like me?"</p><p>Zayn shook his head, flicking the ashes off the end of the cigarette. "Look. I'm pretty sure that you can make any kid like you. You've just got that kind of personality. Anyone likes you."</p><p>"That is not true, technically." He rebutted, wagging a pointed finger at him to make his point. "There was that guy last year that absolutely hated me."</p><p>"You kissed his boyfriend at a party!" The raven haired man chuckled, shaking his head. "That's the one exception."</p><p>Louis huffed, crossing his arms, pressing his back into the leather seat.</p><p>"Its not my fault I was drunk and stupid. I've grown."</p><p>Zayn hummed, not saying much more but he did place a reassuring hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. This was basically his way of saying he'd do great and shut up.</p><p>Once they'd made it to the other side of town and parked in the driveway of what would be his new home, Zayn helped him get his stuff out of the backseat and paused outside. </p><p>He motioned to the house with his hand, sighing. "Suppose I should let you go it alone. It is your job, after all."</p><p>Louis let out a nervous chuckle, nodding. "Yeah, I suppose you should. I'm gonna miss you though."</p><p>Zayn rolled his eyes, knocking his shoulder into his best mate's. "You act like i'm not literally only a thirty minute drive away."</p><p>"Hey, I am allowed to miss you even then. I am going to be spending my days with a 6 year old constantly. I am going to need adult time too. Desperately."</p><p>"Yeah, yeah. I'll let you come to some of the parties the frat house is holding this year, now get inside before you get fired for being late and lazy. Two things you excel at." Zayn replied, pushing Louis towards the door, ignoring the groan of protest.</p><p>He in turn chose to ignore the man's digs and when he heard the car door shut and the putter of it taking off down the street, he pressed the doorbell button, shifting side to side on his feet like he did when he was nervous and anxious.</p><p>The door swung open and instead of seeing the maid as he thought he would, Kendall was standing in front of him, a bright smile stretching across her face.</p><p>"Louis!" She greeted him, ushering him inside. "You're here finally."</p><p>"I'm sorry if i'm late or you were expecting me earlier, I honestly had no idea when to show up." He smiled sheepishly, relaxing a bit when she chuckled.</p><p>Good, she wasn't mad.</p><p>"Of course not. I know we didn't specify a time, I wanted you to have a bit of time settling in before you met Cassie but I didn't want you to rush over. As it happens, you showed up at the perfect time." She rested her hand on his shoulder, guiding him past the entry hall and into the living room. "Theresa, if you wouldn't mind taking Louis' bags up to the guest room while I go find our little safari specialist."</p><p>"Yes, m'am." She said, flashing Louis a polite smile and taking the bags up the stairs.</p><p>He would definitely have to get used to the maid thing. He felt terrible watching her lug his two huge suitcases up the marble staircase and down the hall. Somehow, he figured doing it himself would cause more trouble than good, so he stayed silent.</p><p>"So, as I expected, Harry is in the studio across town, then he has a party to attend but i'm sure you'll meet him later tonight."</p><p>At the mention of Kendall's husband he perked up a little. He was honestly curious what type of guy she was married to though he wasn't sure why he cared so much.</p><p>He shrugged a shoulder, following her through the dining area and to the sliding glass patio door with white trim. "That's alright with me."</p><p>Kendall slid the door open, searching the yard for what he assumed was her daughter.</p><p>At first glance, he saw a huge pool outside surrounded by stone, a few chairs surrounding it, and swim floaties abandoned at the side. Their yard was encased in a barrier of tall hedges, filled with flowers, and a small garden at the far corner of the lawn.</p><p>"Cassie has a very active imagination and last I saw her, she was out here, as she says, searching for dinosaurs."</p><p>Louis let a soft smile light up his face. He really did love kids and the fact that Cassie had such an active imagination made the premise of spending his days with her all the more appealing. He just hoped she felt the same. He was her fourth nanny in two years as Kendall had told him when he confirmed he'd take the position and he could only imagine what reasons there were for that.</p><p>"Cassandra Anne! Come in here and meet Louis!" Kendall called, placing a well manicured hand on her hip as she waited.</p><p>Suddenly, a little girl with bright eyes and wild brown curls came barreling towards the patio door, squealing. She paused when she saw Louis, suddenly becoming very shy, approaching with a caution that he mostly understood. He was a stranger, after all.</p><p>"Hi Cassie." He said, kneeling down to her height when she'd made it over to them. "I'm Louis."</p><p>Kendall smiled fondly at her daughter, rolling her eyes when Cassie hid behind her legs. "You're not usually this shy, what's up with you today, hm?"</p><p>Louis moved on his knees closer, peeking around the woman's legs to see Cassie, crossing his eyes and sticking his tongue out, making her giggle and hide her face in her mother's calf.</p><p>"Hi." She finally said, her voice quiet but sweet.</p><p>"I know its weird meeting new people but I can promise you i'm a cool nanny." He sat back on his legs as she peeked at him from behind Kendall's legs. "I've got a load of sisters, all younger, so you're in good hands."</p><p>Cassie finally moved out from behind her mother, allowing them all to move further into the house. The fact about Louis' family seemed to have piqued her interest, curious brown eyes staring at him intensely. It almost made him uncomfortable how much she seemed to be analyzing him but he figured if it got her to trust him and interact with him, she could do anything she wanted.</p><p>"I'm sorry, she's not usually so quiet and all. She's had a difficult time getting close to nannies. " Kendall apologized. "Ive only recently started -+working again. Its been hard for her to adjust."</p><p>Louis shook his head, holding up a hand. "Its okay, don't worry. Kids react differently to different people. If she needs some time, i'm more than happy to give that to her."</p><p>"My last nanny made me do my homework and eat vegetables." She piped up, making a disgusted face. Louis noticed she had no British accent. Of course, Kendall was American too, so it shouldn't have been that surprising to him. He just hadn't really encountered many Americans before, it made him wonder if Harry was American too or British since they lived here.</p><p>Her mother laughed. "Sweetheart, she's supposed to do that. You need to do your homework for school and vegetables are healthy. You know your dad wouldn't let you get away with none in your diet."</p><p>Cassie's little nose wrinkled. "He can eat them like he does his grass smoothies."</p><p>Louis laughed, leaning forward. "You know, I never liked vegetables either. They're terrible. My mum used to make me eat beets."</p><p>The little girl's brunette head tilted to the side. "You talk funny."</p><p>"Sweetheart, he talks like daddy does. Remember we had that talk? Daddy's from here in England. They have accents." Kendall ran her fingers through Cassie's knotted hair. "Just like the kids at your school."</p><p>"I say a lot of funny words because of my accent. I suppose its a little weirder than your dad. I'm a yorkshire lad, meself." He made the accent thicker as he approached the end of his sentence, causing another giggle to spring forth from Cassie.</p><p>Kendall stared at him, amused. "He's from Cheshire. You two will get along well being English boys alone, i'm sure."</p><p>"Yeahhhhh, english boys." Cassie mocked her, wiggling her little body around, and swinging her arms. She covered her face as she began to laugh soon after, it made him chuckle as well. When she finished, she looked up at her mom. "I like him, he can stay for now."</p><p>Louis let out a heavy breath of relief, happy he'd finally gotten some sort of seal of approval. "Well I will consider that a compliment and its an honor, miss Cassandra."</p><p>"Its Cassie, Lewis. Cass if you're lucky." She said and then sprinted away up the stairs, presumably up to her room.</p><p>"She's very.. rambunctious." Kendall said.</p><p>"I absolutely love it. I'm gonna love working here."</p><p>Louis was actually excited about his job now. Cassie was such a great kid and Kendall was so nice. The jury was still out on Harry but for a bunch of rich people, they seemed like such a plain family. No one was corrupted by greed or materialism. They weren't concerned with class or reputations. They were just.. normal.</p><p>He loved it.</p><p>"We're proud to have you."</p><p>-------------</p><p>As it turns out, it was much easier settling in when he knew that he had at least started to build some kind of friendship with Cassie. No matter how small of steps had been taken.</p><p>After they'd left the living room, Kendall had showed him to the guest room where he would be living, and it was much fancier than any room he'd ever seen before. Even with so little in it.</p><p>He was given the okay to decorate the walls with posters or photos or whatever he wanted but as for the rest of the room, it had already been decorated in soft blue and gold tones. His bed was a huge king size bed with soft, blue sheets and the whole nine. When Louis sat down on it, he contemplated never standing up again.</p><p>The walls were a lighter, sky blue and the drapes were navy with a fancy, golden trimmed desk  sitting in front of the window. There was a large, shiny mahogany dresser opposite his bed with brass handles that he was to use for his clothes because unfortunately they hadn't had a closet put in this room when their house was built.</p><p>In short, he was very lucky for a glorified babysitter. He'd take anything out of this experience he could though while helping to mold the mind of an inquisitive, imaginative little girl and be happy with it.</p><p>He grabbed a towel and stalked into the bathroom that was connected to his room, admiring more black marble and silver fixtures (he was sensing a theme about the house) before stripping and hopping into the large glass shower that was bigger than his room at his mum's house.</p><p>Deciding after his shower he didn't need clothes as it was almost 2:30 in the morning now, he stuck to boxer briefs and sat in his bed, aiming to read the book Zayn had given him before he left.</p><p>They had sort of a weird tradition, Zayn would give him a book to read, and then they would spend hours on skype together discussing it before Zayn inevitably wrote a paper on it. He used to say "its not cheating, i'm just getting two different points of view". Whatever helped him sleep at night.</p><p>About halfway through the book, his stomach started to grumble and he only just realized he hadn't really eaten much during the day. He didn't exactly want to get dressed as his laziness was kicking in but he didn't want to scar anyone potentially still up in the house.</p><p>Kendall being a model and well, Cassie being six, they had to be in bed by now, right?</p><p>Eventually, after trying to read the same page ten times, Louis decided to risk the embarrassment, sneaking down the stairs and into the kitchen. He opened the door to the fridge and freezer, pausing to listen to the silence of the house when he heard a quiet shuffle on the other side of the kitchen door in the entry way.</p><p>When nothing happened and no one entered the kitchen, he continued searching for something to eat.</p><p>He didn't want to waste time making something so he grabbed a tub of ice cream and a spoon but paused once more, hearing the kitchen door creak as it swung open. His vision was partially obstructed by the refrigerator door so he couldn't see much.  Slowly, Louis turned, jumping halfway out of his skin, placing a hand over his bare chest.</p><p>In front of him stood probably one of the most attractive human beings of the male gender he'd ever seen before. That was saying a lot seeing as how there were plenty of hot guys in Zayn's frat he'd seen before. And well there was Zayn, himself.</p><p> A head full of brown curls that were starting to grow longer than an obvious haircut that no doubt took place months ago, the most beautiful, piercing green eyes, and a smirk resting on pink lemonade shaded lips.</p><p>His biceps were bulging slightly as his arms were crossed over his chest. He was covered in tattoos, at least from what Louis could see peeking out from beneath the simple, black t-shirt he wore.</p><p>Suddenly he was all too aware he was half naked. And staring.</p><p>"Uh." He stumbled, looking for something smart or funny or anything to say, really.</p><p>He couldn't find anything.</p><p>"Enjoying yourself?" The man asked, his smirk dissolving as he chewed on the gum in his mouth but there was still a hint of it playing at his lips with the question.</p><p>"I just- hungry." Louis mumbled, nonsensically, lifting the carton and flushing slightly.</p><p>The man uncrossed his arms, moving forward to lean against the island that was separating them on his elbows, Louis trying to ignore the fact that this random person was trailing his eyes over his body. His gaze seemed to burn for a moment but as soon as he had noticed it, it had returned to normal.</p><p>"You're the nanny Kendall hired, aren't you?"</p><p>When Louis spotted the silver ring on his ring finger that absolutely was a wedding ring and not just complimenting the rest that adorned his fingers, he let out a breath. "You're Harry."</p><p>Definitely not a 70 year old man with a floral shirt.</p><p>"Yeah." He said as he smacked his gum, smiling brightly, the trace of a dimple indenting his cheek. Good lord. "I'm sorry if I scared you, I was at the studio pretty late tonight finalizing some things then I had a promo party to attend."</p><p>"You should be, I thought you were a theif." Louis said, returning the ice cream to the freezer, leaning his own forearms on the counter after. "I could have had a heart attack."</p><p>Harry lifted a perfect eyebrow, narrowing his eyes playfully, a smile growing on his lips.</p><p>"That would have been such a tragedy, surely."</p><p>He pretended to look affronted, his hand covering his chest again. "I sense some sarcasm in that remark."</p><p>"Oh I assure you, there's nothing of the sort, darling." Harry replied.</p><p>Louis swallowed hard, searching his brain for something to say again and desperately trying to ignore the thought that Harry was possibly flirting with him right now. That was absolutely preposterous. He was just teasing him. Poking a bit of fun. Perhaps this was just how he was.</p><p>"Sorry, are pet names a bit much?"</p><p>Shaken out of his thoughts, Louis blinked at him. "I'm sorry?"</p><p>Harry chuckled, moving around the island to get a bottle of water from the fridge. "I have a tendency to be a little friendly with people. Gets me in trouble a lot."</p><p>"I never thought charm was a horrible trait but I guess i'm mistaken." </p><p>"You think i'm charming...?" He trailed off, obviously not knowing his name.</p><p>He jumped at the chance to speak again. "Louis. My name's Louis. And yes, maybe. Sort of."</p><p>Harry laughed once more. "So, Louis. Tell me about you, then."</p><p>"You really want to do this at 3 in the morning?" Louis asked him incredulously, though he honestly didn't care too much. He couldn't deny he was curious about Harry as well.</p><p>Harry made a face, glancing at the clock on his phone. "I guess you're right. You're gonna need to get up early with Cass so you can get her off to school. Besides, we have alll the time in the world. Goodnight, Louis."</p><p>He winked and turned away, exiting the kitchen, and heading to bed, leaving Louis behind a frayed mess of nerves and attraction and stupidity.</p><p>Louis rushed back to his room, grabbing his cell phone which he'd left charging when he'd snuck downstairs and dialed Zayn's number, obviously panicking.</p><p>"What do you want?" Came Zayn's voice on the other line.</p><p>Louis knew he wasn't sleeping but Zayn usually didn't like to be bothered after midnight but he'd have to make an exception so he could have a nervous breakdown.</p><p>"He's fucking hot, Zayn." Louis whined, plopping on his back on the bed.</p><p>There was silence on the other end before Zayn spoke. "Who the fuck are we talking about?"</p><p>"Harry? Kendall's husband? He's so gorgeous and I may be insane but I think he was checking me out and flirting with me. Which of course led me to make a fool of myself."</p><p>He knew it was unreasonable and idiotic to assume he was right but Zayn usually put him in his place really quickly which was the only reason he had called him. He couldn't think this shit. He really fucking couldn't. It would ruin everything and it was way too early in this job to go insane.</p><p>Zayn sighed and shuffled on the other end, presumably putting the joint he was probably smoking down. "Louis, he's married. To a woman. I'm pretty sure you were imagining shit. He's probably just really friendly. Besides, you making a fool of yourself isn't that uncommon."</p><p>"Well he did say that gets him in trouble a lot. Being friendly." Louis exhaled shakily, sitting up, rubbing a hand over his face. "I know he's married, unfortunately, asshole."</p><p>"See? He's just being nice. Anyway, I like to think I know you well. You wouldn't be fucked up enough to flirt with or fuck him anyway, would you?"</p><p>"Of course not." He scoffed, rubbing his tired eyes. "I'm not that much of a slut, you know? Only about two percent."</p><p>"I don't think you can be a slut at all if you're a virgin, mate." Zayn was clearly smirking, he could hear it in the man's voice and he didn't appreciate it.</p><p>"Oh fuck you. Just because I haven't had sex doesn't mean my mouth hasn't been busy." Louis retorted.</p><p>"Doing what, exactly?"</p><p>Louis paused, rolling his eyes. Zayn knew too much about him.  "You know what, Zayn? I hate you." He grumbled.</p><p>Zayn laughed. "I love you too. You and your virginal soul. Now go to bed, shithead."</p><p>He hung up before Louis could respond and it was probably for the better because he was tired and grumpy and getting more shit about how he was an eighteen year old virgin when Zayn had probably had enough hookups to last him a lifetime was getting a bit old.</p><p>Crawling underneath the covers, he set the alarm on his phone for 6 am. It was going to be a long day tomorrow. His first official day of work and he already had lost sleep but he couldn't bring himself to regret meeting Harry even if he'd been scantily clad and word stupid at the time.</p><p>If anything, he hoped they could be good friends. Obviously Louis was attracted to him but he had enough information to keep himself in check. That'd have to do for now.</p><p>He had a little girl to take care of and by the sounds of it she could use someone who can relate to her and be there when her parents couldn't.</p><p>He really hoped he was that person.</p><p>------------</p><p>Upon feeling his phone vibrating against the bed next to him, Louis groaned.</p><p>He grabbed the phone, illuminating the screen with the press of a button and groaned once more as he read the clock, which said 6 am on the dot. </p><p>It felt like he'd been asleep ten minutes. He really shouldn't have stayed up until 4 am, hungry or not.</p><p>Rolling out of bed, he extended his arms above his head, stretching his entire body as well as he could before deciding upon what he should wear today. Not that it really mattered, it wasn't a fashion show.</p><p>Louis' stomach rolled over and tingled slightly at his recollection of his conversation with Harry the night before, briefly wondering if he'd see the man at breakfast.</p><p>Maybe he could take a bit of care in his appearance after all. Not for Harry. No way. Just to feel more confident.</p><p>After getting dressed in simple sweats and a tee (because he figured dressing up to impress a married dude was nuts) and fighting with his mess of hair, eventually just letting the fringe fall in his eyes, he stepped out into the hallway. He closed the door behind him and walked slowly down the hall towards Cassie's room which Kendall had pointed out when she took him on a tour.</p><p>He knocked lightly on her door, covered in little pink and purple flowers and stars, and entered, not at all surprised to see a little lump in the bed still. Louis walked into the room and around the bed, placing his hand gently on her side. </p><p>"Cassie, love, its time to get up." He said, softly, jostling her when she didn't move.</p><p>When she swatted at his hand from under the blanket, he laughed, tugging at the blanket.</p><p>"Come now, young lady. You need to get to school. We gotta get you breakfast first, though."</p><p>Cassie groaned and Louis felt her pain but finished tugging the blanket off, leaving her uncovered.</p><p>"Its cold, LouLou." She whined, her face all scrunched up, her curls sticking up every which way as she sat up. He tried not to be too embrassing over the fact that she was using nicknames already but his heart was warming considerably.</p><p>Louis schooled his voice into one of enthusiasm. "I know, love but the sooner you get dressed and downstairs, the sooner you can wake up and be ready to go to school!"</p><p>Cassie gave him an unimpressed look, kicking the light pink blankets off her legs aggressively and stalking towards her bathroom to brush her teeth.</p><p>While he waited for her to finish up in the bathroom and get dressed, Louis surveyed the room, his eyes landing on a framed picture on Cassie's nightstand of her, Kendall, and Harry with a birthday cake that had a big candle in the shape of a 5 on it. All their faces looked bright and happy, the dimples in Harry's face on full display, creating indents in his cheeks.</p><p>It made him feel guitly for thinking he had to have been some old, rich dude that worked too much that Kendall was using for his money. It also made him miss his mum quite a bit. Reminded him of all the birthdays they shared and inspired a spark of jealousy that this little girl actually got to spend them with her dad.</p><p>Cassie shook Louis out of his thoughts when she tugged on his shirt, staring up at him expectantly as if she said something he didn't hear. Her usually wild hair was a little bit more tame.</p><p>"I said i'm ready for breakfast, Lou!"</p><p>He nodded, turning to her with a bright grin. "Alright, love. Lets go get breakfast before you have to get on the bus."</p><p>They both made their way down the stairs and into the kitchen, Louis almost stopping short when he noticed Harry standing at the counter, fully dressed in a crisp white button up and black skinnies, flipping through the newspaper. He didn't really take Harry for the type to read the newspaper but obviously he didn't really know much about him at all. Louis excelled at mysteries.</p><p>Harry smiled when he saw Cassie and Louis enter, flipping the page of the newspaper in front of him.</p><p>"Morning sweetheart." He paused, nodding towards the boy in front of him with a grin that was all his own. " Louis. Fancy meeting you here again."</p><p>"Morning daddy!" She said, running around the counter to hug Harry's side. It made Louis' heart throb with how much she loved him. His heart practically exploded when he lifted her onto his lap and kissed her on the top of the head, squeezing her little body against his.</p><p>"G'morning, Harry. Now what do we want for breakfast?" Louis inquired, a flush spreading across his face involuntarily, but he took a deep breath, focusing on Cassandra. He was a professional after all, even in the face of having an extremely attractive boss.</p><p>Harry nodded towards a pantry door just behind him. "She usually just has her cereal, its in the cupboard. Figured its fast but filling."</p><p>Cassie let out an excited cheer at the prospect of having cereal, wriggling and clapping in Harry's lap. Apparently it was her favorite breakfast food, he'd need to file that away for later. She jumped out of her father's lap and pulled herself up onto a stool while Louis got it out and poured her a bowl, adding the milk when Harry handed it to him with a wink.</p><p>As she chomped on her cereal, things went silent. It was a comfortable silence, though which had Louis relieved but it wasn't long until they heard a honk outside, a bus parked out front to take Cassie to school.</p><p>“Alright, I assume that's for you. Get your tiny butt going.” Louis said, watching her jump off the stool and gallop to Harry, the older man encasing her in a tight hug.</p><p>“Have a lovely day, sweetheart. What are you going to do today?” He inquired, lifting his eyebrows expectantly as he combed his fingers through her hair.</p><p>“Treat people with kindness, I know, daddy.” Cassie replied, a hint of exasperation in her voice as if Harry made her say this every single day. From what Louis could tell, he probably did.</p><p>Harry beamed, kissing her on the cheek. “Good. Off you go, then.”</p><p>When Harry caught him staring curiously after Cassie had bolted out the door,  Louis flushed even deeper, turning away to fold up the cereal and return it to the pantry.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Louis glanced at him, grabbing the discarded cereal bowl. Maybe if he ignored his blush, it would go away.</p><p>He shrugged. “Its just that i've never heard that kind of thing before. Its nice. Maybe if more kids did and said that each morning, there'd be less bullying.”</p><p>Harry considered it for a moment. “That's a good point but i'm sure there's always going to be that one person who doesn't care.“</p><p>“Either way, s'good of you to do that. I admire that as a kid who's been bullied.” Louis finished, sitting on the stool Cassie had once occupied, his gaze directing itself to the man in front of him. “One that hasn't fared so well even when he's gotten help.”</p><p>“I'm sorry that you didn't. I really want her to know that kindness is something you should always practice.” Harry folded the newspaper in front of him, laying it on the island to be able to focus on Louis. “Even if someone else isn't practicing the same thing. She will always be the bigger person. Its the motto i've always instilled in myself and its gotten me pretty far.”</p><p>“I don't doubt that at all.”</p><p>They went silent for a moment, simply staring at one another. Harry was smiling softly, out of appreciation or something else, he couldn't figure it out but the moment felt charged. It made his heart speed up a little.</p><p>“I should probably get down to the studio and finish some things.” Harry finally said, clearing his throat.</p><p>“Okay.” Louis mumbled, turning his gaze away from the intense staring match, looking down instead at his fingers fumbling together on the top of the counter.</p><p>Harry nodded, turning towards Louis, a hand poised on the kitchen door. “My studio in the house is through the door to the left of the kitchen door.” His head nodded in that general direction. “Our house is a bit oddly laid out but you get used to it after a while.”</p><p>All he could do was nod, mouth having gone a little dry from their eye contact earlier.</p><p>“You're free to come down anytime but if i'm with someone helping them produce a track i'd rather be left alone, if you don't mind.”</p><p>Louis felt weird about it but the fact that Harry was being so polite and allowing him into his personal space was making his gut burn. Surely that kind of thing was just common courtesy and not something to be turned on by but his body was betraying him gravely. All he could do was hope Harry left soon before things progressed so far that his trackies were tighter.</p><p>To his relief, the man nodded again, and pushed his way through the kitchen door, leaving Louis alone.</p><p>-------</p><p>Cassie returned home promptly in the afternoon, the bus pulling up just where they'd picked her up this morning.</p><p>Louis met her on the sidewalk, smiling brightly when she came bounding down the steps, the driver yelling after her to slow down. She almost barreled him over wrapping her arms around his legs as soon as she got close enough.</p><p>Frankly, he was surprised she'd taken to him this fast, expecting to need at least a week to form a bond with the girl but he would take anything he could get.</p><p>He picked up her backpack, sliding it over his shoulder to carry it for her as she ran ahead of him up the driveway and into the house, slamming the door behind her.</p><p>When he reached the house, Harry was standing in the foyer, stretching his arms above his head outside his studio door, scratching his stomach. He was rumpled and his shirt wrinkled like he had been sleeping in the studio but it was understandable because he'd been working in there for hours. All day since their encounter this morning, Louis had noticed.</p><p>“Hey little monster.” Harry greeted his daughter, scooping her up into his arms, her own arms clasping around his neck. “How was school?”</p><p>“I painted a picture of a rainbow today and in math I got all my questions right!”</p><p>Harry's eyes lit up, his mouth falling open. “You did?! Boy, you must be really smart, I can't even do that.”</p><p>Louis leaned back against the wall, still gripping the strap of Cassie's backpack, watching the exchange. It really was the cutest thing he'd ever seen, Harry's interactions with her. It made him wonder just why they needed a nanny when Harry seemed to be very involved when Kendall was at work or conversing with her mum over skype in her office.</p><p>While Kendall had told him she'd gone back to work and Cassie was having trouble dealing with it, it didn't really seem to be the case. Unless there was something he was missing.</p><p>“Dadddyyyy.” Cassie whined, poking his nose with her finger. “You're a smarty pants too, you know it!”</p><p>She seemed so much like a well adjusted little girl with a deep love of her father, so what was the problem?</p><p>Harry shook his head, his curls bouncing along. The little girl whined as she put him down, a frown beginning to take shape on her mouth.</p><p>“Ive gotta work, love. You know this. You've got homework too no doubt.”</p><p>She rolled her eyes, huffing out a breath so strong it blew the hair in her face off.</p><p>“I knowww.” she said, suddenly seeming less of the enthusiastic girl she was just a mere moment ago.</p><p>And oh.</p><p>
  <i>Oh.</i>
</p><p><i>This</i> is why.</p><p>Louis' mind flashed back to Kendall and his first conversation. To what she said about Harry being busy in the studio and him being there till the wee hours of the morning. Was it like this everyday?</p><p>Was Harry really so consumed in his work in the studio that he was spending every single waking moment in there? He realized he'd only seen Harry at breakfast and during this few minutes of interaction with Cassandra. The little girl seemed disappointed when he said he had to work, as if she'd been through this several times before.</p><p>Kendall and Harry weren't rich snobs or social climbers, they were just workaholics who seemed to be spending not nearly as much time with their daughter as they should be and that's where he began to develop a sour taste in his mouth towards them.</p><p>Working was important, yes. Of course. It seemed they both enjoyed their work to an extent but when it got so consuming that their daughter was starting to feel sad and upset, well that just wasn't going to work. They'd hired a nanny to be the buffer. To be the distraction when they were busy and while admirable so she didn't have to be alone, it was also sad. And a little shitty.</p><p>Louis sighed, stepping forward to help Harry out. “Cassie, why don't we go upstairs and do something together.”</p><p>While Harry shot him an apologetic but thankful look, then disappeared, the girl perked up a little, her gaze shooting to him.</p><p>Louis' heart ached a little as Cassie gave a lingering look towards the studio door before walking up to him, grabbing his hand, and dragging him upstairs to her room.</p><p>She ended up showing him her various baby dolls, telling him each one of their names, and warning him not to get them wrong or they'd cry. She showed him her barbies and then her craft corner, a little wooden desk with paints, crayons, markers, colored paper, glitter, and construction paper.</p><p>Which is how they ended up sitting at the dining room table, Cassie with her markers, drawing a picture of a house and a bunch of people, with flowers. The standard kid picture. Louis hand a crayon in his hand but nothing ended up on his paper, watching as the little girl decorated her picture more and more.</p><p>“Louis?” She inquired, not looking up from her drawing, pulling Louis out of his daze.</p><p>Louis tilted his head. “What, love?”</p><p>Cassie looked up at him, wearing on her lower lip with her little teeth before speaking, as if Louis might deny her. “Do you think that maybe I can have my dance class here sometime?”</p><p>Confused as to why she was so hesitant to ask, he replied. “I don't see why not. Do they do that? Have dance classes at people's houses sometimes?"</p><p>She nodded, drawing a sun in the corner of the drawing, coloring it rainbow instead of just yellow.</p><p>“We had it at Lydia's house last time and I wanted to do that but last time I asked mommy said no because it was too much for her.” She shrugged more to herself than anyone else, it seemed. “I thought maybe we could ask daddy and do it now that you're here.”</p><p>Louis grinned, his head bobbing up and down in a nod. “Of course, Cass, ill ask your dad when I can, I promise.”</p><p>Cassie's face lit up but then she covered her paper with her arm and face, grabbing the red and blue markers. She then finished, raising it up to him.</p><p>“Its for you.” She said shyly.</p><p>When Louis saw it, he nearly cried. It was the picture of what looked like her and her parents outside of their house in the sun.</p><p>Looking better at it, he saw that she'd drawn a red heart with an L inside it just above their heads as well.</p><p>----------</p><p>As it happened, the whole first week Louis had worked for Harry and Kendall, he only saw or spoke to them a handful of times.</p><p>Harry would be there at breakfast, Kendall having left already, but as soon as he finished his tea or whatever he'd been eating, he would disappear into his studio for hours. Louis almost felt bad for the poor guy.</p><p>It had to be horrible working this much but his subconscious told him that Harry was  most likely choosing this and that just seemed worse to him.</p><p>Cassie had become a near constant presence at his side when she came home. He couldn't really say he minded much as that was the whole reason he was there in the first place but he had formed a type of close relationship with her that he had come to cherish in that short amount of time.</p><p>She would come home from school, they would sit at the table, and he would help her with any work that she'd come home with. He would help her sound out words as he listened to her read books she was supposed to read for class.</p><p>The times where she would spend a few wayward moments with Harry were few and far between but when they would happen, he would see the most cheerful little girl he'd ever seen. Only to watch that smile fade as fast as it came when he would leave again, leaving him to pick up the pieces and cheer her up.</p><p>It was manageable for him though. He had a lot of experience dealing with disappointed little girls when his sisters would be sad that their dad didn't show up or that he would cancel a weekend he was supposed to take them.</p><p>So to say he considered himself an expert at distracting children from their mostly absent fathers, was an understatement. Hell, before he had to do it for others, he'd had to do it for himself. Considering how it made him feel, he didn't think anyone should have to go through those types of feelings. Eventually the sadness turns to anger and you ended up resenting them. Or so that was his own experience.</p><p>Louis supposed he couldn't really blame Harry for being busy though. For the past few days, some guy had been showing up to the house claiming that his name was Aiden and he was there for Harry. Apparently the man was helping him with his first album as it seemed Harry not only produced but he was basically involved in all facets of the music business in some way.</p><p>Aiden would be down in the studio with Harry for hours at a time both of them not surfacing until the blue eyed music artist would come sauntering out, Harry walking him to the front door and waving him off.</p><p>He and Louis had shared a few glances as he walked back through the studio door, Harry's cheeks flushed a light shade of red and hair a bit disheveled.</p><p>Louis' gut would burn in that familiar way but when Harry would disappear, it would go back to normal. He'd been pretty good about keeping his attraction to Harry at bay. He knew it would never go anywhere.</p><p>Today though, Harry and Aiden were in the studio for five hours straight and still the younger man hadn't left yet. He assumed he was younger, anyway. He had one of those baby faces and if he wasn't so obviously annoyed by Aiden's presence, which he didn't intend to read into, he would probably try to hit on him.</p><p>Louis really needed to talk to Harry to ask him if Cassie's dance class could come over to the house in a few days. It was Tuesday, a week after she'd asked and he'd basically forgotten to get Harry's permission even with Cassie hounding him about asking. Now that she was at her dance class friend Mikayla's house, playing and wasn't due back for a few hours, he had time to kill and the dance class was Friday.</p><p>He knew that Harry had said he preferred to be left alone when he was with an artist but surely if it was about Cassie, he would make an exception. Just this once at least.</p><p>Tiptoeing towards the studio door, his hand grabbed the silver handle but he paused, suddenly nervous. He didn't want to be rude or piss Harry off but he really needed to figure this out so the little girl could tell her friends and their moms.</p><p>Louis took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly, turning the knob and pulling the door open, the wood only making the faintest creak.</p><p>Closing the door behind him, he was immersed in dim lighting and confronted with a long, narrow hallway with red carpet and darker red walls. He was always curious about what this looked like and now he was abut to find out.</p><p>When he got halfway down the hall he had to step down a few stairs, coming up to a black door with a circular window cut out in the middle of it, the glass blurry but clear enough for Louis to look through and see two people.</p><p>It looked like a standard studio with mixers and the mics used to record with glass separating the two rooms from each other as normal studios would have.</p><p>That's not what got his attention, however.</p><p>What he didnt expect to see was Harry in a black leather chair and Aiden in his lap, kissing him, his fingers tangled deep in the man's curly hair, no shirt on.</p><p>Louis froze, his eyes widening slightly, mouth agape but it sank open even more when he realized Aiden didn't just have his shirt off, he was naked.</p><p>And they weren't just kissing, they were having sex, Aiden's soft moans able to be heard even through the door.</p><p>Harry's head tipped backwards, his black button up shirt unbuttoned while Aiden mouthed at his neck, bouncing in his lap. He was gripping the male's arms, his knuckles white as it was clear he was using it for leverage to ride him better.</p><p>He couldn't move. He was having an existential crisis right in the middle of a fucking hallway in which he was watching his supposedly straight and married boss have sex with a guy. He felt like his brain was short circuiting.</p><p>Louis' breath was shaky as he exhaled, unable to even take a full breath. He willed himself to turn around, his heart thudding like a drum against his chest. He felt like he had lava coursing through his veins. His insides were burning. From what emotion, he couldn't tell.</p><p><i>Anger? Embarrassment? Jealousy? Arousal?</i>His brain was too cloudy to identify it or anything, really.</p><p>He kept trying to make his body move. Do anything but it was like a car accident. You couldn't turn your attention away no matter how horrified you were, it just drew your attention.</p><p>When he heard a strangled cry, he felt lightheaded. He looked in the window, discovering that they'd stopped. They were kissing instead, clearly having come already.</p><p>A sudden wave of nausea overcame him, causing him to lean back against the wall, arms spread out, fingers spread apart on the chipping red paint of the wall. He shouldn't be here. He really shouldn't. Aiden could leave any second and they'd discover Louis sitting here on the verge of passing out and he really doubted that would bode well for his working relationship with Harry. Being a snoop.</p><p>As soon as he heard feet hit the floor, he turned his body as best he could in what felt like an inebriated state and ran. He ran as fast as his unsteady legs would carry him until he got to his room, then he locked himself in.</p><p>~~~~~~</p><p>Finally in the safety of his room, he leaned back against the door, trying to catch his breath and will himself not to vomit all over his bedroom floor because <i>what the fuck</i>?</p><p>Harry Styles, his boss, the man married to Kendall Jenner, was in his studio having sex with another guy. It was such a hard concept to comprehend from all the facts that he'd been presented in the past week or so that he had been working here.</p><p>Granted, he hadn't really had much interaction with Harry besides in the kitchen at 3 am and even then he seemed a bit- flirty?</p><p>That sent him into a whole other tailspin of breakdowns.</p><p>He didn't know why he was reacting so strongly to something like this. Its not like this never happened. Straight dudes have affairs with guys all the time. Of course, that would make him not straight and that opened up a new can of issues especially when it came to Cassie.</p><p>He couldnt just go up to Harry and say “hey I saw you having sex with that dude”. Harry would know he watched them do it and it would be way too embarrassing to admit to.</p><p>Louis couldn't even begin to acknowledge that an attraction between both of them seemed even more plausible. It would have been easier to leave this all alone when he thought he was straight and married. What is he supposed to do with this now?</p><p>He couldn't think about any of this anymore otherwise he'd collapse into a heap altogether. He had to focus on Cassie and figure out how to deal with this piece of info that he'd just stumbled across later.
</p><p>So he pulled himself together by throwing some water in his face in the bathroom and he went back downstairs just in time for Aiden to wave goodbye to him as he walked out the front door, all smiles. His stomach turned slightly.</p><p>Luckily, Cassie returned from her friend's house early, beaming up at him when she walked in the door. “Loulou!” She exclaimed and then..</p><p>“Did you ask daddy today?”</p><p>Louis paled slightly but maintained his smile, then changed the subject.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Sorry this took a bit to finish, i've been grappling with a few different health issues lately.</p>
<p>Ive been working a little bit everyday since I posted the first chapter but my motivation has been a bit lax.<br/>However, as the story is ramping up, Im sure that the chapters will come easier.</p>
<p>Enjoy xo</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He wasn't avoiding Harry. Not at all. As a matter of fact, it would have been nice if he could have avoided him for a few days. Let things pass and try to figure out how the hell to cope with this shit. However, that was way too hard to do when Cassie would attach herself to Harry's hip in the mornings before Louis took her to the school bus.</p>
<p>Louis would just have to avoid eye contact and only speak when spoken to. Unfortunately for him, Harry seemed to take a keen interest in him and his life now that he was probably less distracted by sexual frustration and work.</p>
<p>This morning, Louis was sitting in the kitchen, at the island across from Harry, munching on the corner of his toast. Eventually, he threw it back onto the plate in front of him, only half done. He didn't really have much of an appetite at the moment, the nerves and awkwardness consuming the entirety of his stomach.</p>
<p>Harry was doing his usual routine. Flipping through a newspaper as he slowly sipped on his tea and he was having a hard time with the fact that this man was acting like nothing was wrong. Of course, he had absolutely no idea that Louis had seen him engaged in the throes of passion with another dude.</p>
<p>So while Louis was sitting here having his fourth existential crisis since a couple days ago silently inside the expanses of his mind, Harry was just sitting there, an unknown spectator.</p>
<p>It was Friday and he'd had to suck it up and tell Cassie before they went outside to the bus that he hadn't been able to ask her dad about the dance class coming over. He felt horrible when he saw her expression fall. It killed him inside, but he promised her that he would absolutely try to ask him this weekend so they were prepared for the next week.</p>
<p>Louis was going to have to bring up the little girl's dance class at some point. He couldn't get around it again because the look of disappointment on her face this morning was too much for his heart to bear. Cassie deserved this more than anything with all that she had to deal with as a 6 year old, so he decided to swallow his anxiousness and opened his mouth. However, nothing came out, his lips and mouth dry were dry as a desert.</p>
<p>Why on earth was he struggling so hard with this? Harry was just a guy. Its not like he'd witnessed a murder or anything.</p>
<p>“Harry.” Louis croaked out, shocked by his own voice forcing its way through his mouth. Even if he did sound like he'd just swallowed sixty tons of glass bits.</p>
<p>Harry lowered the corner of his newspaper, quirking an eyebrow at him. “Hmm?”</p>
<p>When he didn't answer, simply staring at Harry wide eyed, the man folded up the paper and laid it down on the counter in front of him.</p>
<p>“Louis? Did you need something?”</p>
<p>He could see a flicker of amusement pass over his facial features and that was it, really. Something inside him must have snapped, half anger and half mortification, which only made him madder. He was tired of being fucked up over this. He was going to kill two birds with one big ass stone.</p>
<p>“Uh.. well-”</p>
<p>If only Louis'  brain would pair together the right words.</p>
<p>Harry stood up, taking his teacup to the sink. “You can tell me or ask me anything if that makes you feel more comfortable.”</p>
<p>Louis exhaled, nervously. His blood seemed to boil a little less at the man's politeness. “Its kind of a two part thing but one is decidedly more.. complicated than the other.”</p>
<p>It was then at that inconvenient moment, he noticed his insides weren't heated with attraction like they usually were whenever he was around Harry. I mean, he was eighteen, he was lucky if brushing up against a tree or something didn't make his lower half stand at attention. He'd figured maybe it was this whole situation that he was privy to making him less keen on focusing on the fact that Harry looked hot today. It felt weird. That being said, it was no easy feat to him, making a simple white t-shirt and black track pants bunched at the ankles with tousled hair look like a runway look but he seemed to make everything work. All the rings adorning his fingers along with his wedding ring caught his attention for a few moments as well, his insides shivering.</p>
<p>Harry rivaled that of some of the prettiest male models Louis had ever seen when he'd watch fashion shows or the guys in Zayn's frat at his uni. And believe him, he'd looked long and hard at those frat boys.</p>
<p>He decided after much deliberation the night before that he was mostly in denial what this entire thing would mean for them. It seemed all the more plausible that Harry could be into men and that meant he had to confront the fact that the attraction between them could be mutual at some point and Louis has no idea how to take that. It was so much easier when he was ignorant. Ignorance really was bliss.</p>
<p>He'd really have to stop giving Zayn shit for his cliché sayings. They seemed to apply to his life more and more lately.</p>
<p>Its not like it was as complicated as having full blown feelings, though. He'd dodged that bullet for the time being, having not had a chance to even really sit down with Harry and get to know him. He was always working. Thank god.</p>
<p>“Well why don't we start with the easy thing, then?” Harry spoke finally, leaning on his hands, the black marble under his fingers, shocking Louis back into reality and out of his miserable thoughts.</p>
<p>He couldn't help but be jealous for a second that the counter got to be touched by such lovely hands. Oh to be a counter under Harry Styles' hands.</p>
<p>
  <i>Oops. Focus.</i>
</p>
<p>Louis smiled, or at least he tried to smile. He was kind of thankful he couldn't see himself in a mirror right now. He probably looked constipated and awkward sitting here staring at this man who was looking at him expectantly.</p>
<p>He sighed. “Cassie wanted me to ask you about possibly having her dance class over here next week. I would have asked you on Tuesday but you were... busy.”</p>
<p>Harry's attention seemed to fix harder on Louis' face rather than wandering. Noticing how delayed the end of his statement was his eyelid twitched subtly. It seemed like worry and confusion were sunken into the deep parts of the green irises staring back at him but he couldn't tell for sure.</p>
<p>If Harry was outwardly nervous, he was sure as hell good at hiding it, but his body seemed to betraying him slowly, regardless of whether he was good at it or not. Maybe he was nervous for another reason.</p>
<p>Maybe was bullshit, really.</p>
<p>“Is that all?” He laughed, of all things. <i>Laughed.</i> “Of course you guys can have the dance class here.”</p>
<p>Louis cleared his throat uncomfortable, tearing his own gaze away from the green eyes fixated on him, and focusing them on the counter in front of them. He suddenly found himself unable to look Harry in the eye and his insides were starting to churn. Apparently all his courage had evaporated. He wasn't worried, until his head started to swirl and it felt like he was going to vomit, but it wasn't puke on its way out.</p>
<p>He couldn't hold it in anymore.</p>
<p>“I came down to your studio Tuesday.”</p>
<p>Harry froze, his shoulders tensing visibly but his face schooled into a mix of confusion and indifference. “Okay, and?”</p>
<p>“When I said I was going to ask you if Cassie's dance class could come over. I actually tried.” Louis wasn't sure where all this was coming from.</p>
<p>Guess word vomit was a real thing, not just a term for teen movies.</p>
<p>Some deep recess in his mind needed to be rid of this burden. He needed answers immediately about just what the hell was going on here. About why exactly it was his life turned upside down in one day while everyone else got to live an uncomplicated life with their little secrets.</p>
<p>He wondered why he couldn't just forget it and walk around ignorant like everyone else. Then his mum's voice appeared in his head, telling him he was a better person than that. That he'd never been able to shy away from confrontation. She was right, obviously.</p>
<p>Harry shifted uncomfortably between his feet, his body moving backwards to lean against the counter behind him, his arms crossed over his body. It looked like a defensive gesture and it made Louis feel vaguely satisfied.
</p>
<p>
  <i>Gotcha.</i>
</p>
<p>“Louis, I don't understand what you're trying to get at.”</p>
<p>Louis summoned all his practically nonexistent confidence, feeling the satisfaction of knocking the amused look off of Harry's face. He leveled the man with a look. “You were busy. With Aiden.”</p>
<p>The man wore his teeth along his lower lip, realization shining in his eyes, as his jaw dropped slightly. He felt shameful but he knew this was the right thing to do.</p>
<p>“Look, I know that you probably don't understand-”</p>
<p>“Understand what? That you're cheating on your wife with some dude you work with?” Louis cut him off.</p>
<p>Harry rubbed his hands over his face, clearly knowing he'd been caught. The man looked positively embarrassed and his face had paled considerably since this morning. He couldn't help but feel a little bad for the guy but he also had to remind himself this was fucked up and he had no sympathy for cheaters.</p>
<p>He pressed his hands to his mouth, staring up at a point above Louis' head, looking like he was trying to gather his words inside his head.</p>
<p>“Louis..” Harry started, moving his hands, exhaling with his eyes closed. When he opened his eyes again, they were a little more glassy than they had been.</p>
<p>“I know that you don't get it right now, but I really can explain. Its a lot more complicated than it seems.”</p>
<p>Louis held up his hands, scoffing. “I know what cheating looks like, Harry. Don't try to explain away all of this. Its messed up. You're married.”</p>
<p>His voice was filled with disdain but he couldn't help it. When Louis decided to work here, this was the last thing he ever thought he'd have to deal with.</p>
<p>”I really can explain.” Harry repeated, his voice strained like he was struggling with holding everything in.</p>
<p>Louis crossed his arms, cocking his hip out to the side. “Start explaining then.”</p>
<p>Harry shook his head, moving around the island that separated them, stopping right in front of Louis. “Not here. I can't explain here, somewhere else.”</p>
<p>“Then where, Harry? I'm having just a little trouble accepting the fact that you're just sleeping with your male music artists in the house that you share with your wife and daughter.” He snapped, stepping backwards, away from Harry's rapidly approaching body.</p>
<p>Harry's face fell once again, seeming to crumple in on himself. Louis should feel guilty and he does. His heart feels heavy but fragile as he observes that Harry is very visibly upset by the fact that he knows about his affair.</p>
<p>His eyes are wide, glassy, and wet and he looks like he's on the verge of crying at any minute. He keeps running his fingers through his unruly hair which is quickly becoming even more disheveled and standing out on every which side. He looks crazy.</p>
<p>Desperate is more the word. He looks desperate. Desperate to explain himself and to explain why such a thing happened. From the sounds of it, it sounds like this thing with Aiden wasn't the first time.</p>
<p>He looks every bit the deer caught in the headlights. Or maybe a deer caught with a rifle in his face.</p>
<p>But at the same time, Louis was always taught to respect women. It was one of the most important lessons he was taught by his mum growing up and he's convinced it was because none of the men in her life really respected her as a human being with emotions. They always left her and usually for another woman. She wanted her son to do better.</p>
<p>Being faced with this kind of situation instantly made him feel angry. Defensive. Willing to fight for every single woman who was wronged by any man in their life. He was tired of watching women being taken advantage of. After years of watching it happen to his mum, this was the straw that broke the camel's back.</p>
<p>Did he really owe Harry the right to explain, though? Sure Kendall had been a little absent but that didn't really give her husband the right to cheat on her. Especially if it was with a man. If he wasn't happy, he should have just left.</p>
<p>“Can we just go to lunch or something? I'll explain everything.” Harry asked, his voice shaking slightly.</p>
<p>Harry's hands were shaking too but Louis refused to let his resolve crumble. He did however allow himself to give the man one chance to change his mind.</p>
<p>“Fine.” Louis conceded, sighing. “We can go to lunch and talk.”</p>
<p>The man in front of him sighed thankfully, nodding. “Thank you.” His voice was meek but Louis could still hear it.</p>
<p>Louis rolled his eyes, he was tired. “You better have a really good fucking excuse, Styles. This shit doesn't fly where i'm from.”</p>
<p>Harry wiped his eyes with his hands, sniffling a little. “I swear it will all make more sense when we talk.”</p>
<p>”Yeah, well. Whenever you wanna go, we can go.”</p>
<p>Louis walked out of the kitchen hastily, refusing to listen to Harry's reply. He needed a second to breathe. This whole thing was insane. Did Harry really thing he had the magic explanation for something like this? Something that would make everything all better again? It was impossible.</p>
<p>He ran upstairs and slammed the door to his room. He wasn't usually one for temper tantrums but he was feeling especially moody today. Why him? What's more, should he tell Kendall about this? If it were his mum in this situation, he would tell her straight away but there was something about the way Harry said that he could explain everything that made him want to let him. He wasn't a second chance person. Once you're a shitty person, you're shitty. That's that.</p>
<p>So why was Harry an exception? That was the question circulating his mind as Louis walked into the bathroom, leaning against the cold counter, staring at himself in the mirror. He was flushed, the skin on his face and neck a light shade of red. A mix of anger and frustration seeping out invisibly through his pores.</p>
<p>There was a little time before Harry would want to go out so a shower might be enough to calm the volcano of emotions erupting inside him.</p>
<p>Louis removed his clothes quickly, not even waiting for the spray of the water to turn warm before stepping in. The cold water hitting his warm skin would probably do him a little good.</p>
<p>Underneath the spray, he tilted his head backwards, allowing the now warming water to cascade down his body to ease the ache in his muscles. He immersed his head in the water, feeling the droplets run through his hair and flatten it onto his forehead, down his face.</p>
<p>If there was anyone that could help him put together his thoughts. It was Zayn. So instead of finishing his shower, he shut the water off, grabbed a towel, and walked out into the bedroom with it wrapped around his waist. Grabbing his phone, he scrolled until he found Zayn's number in his contacts and pressed the dial button. If anything he just needed his best mate.</p>
<p>He picked up on the third ring. “What's up, Lou? How's work going?”</p>
<p>Louis laughed humorlessly, beginning to pace his room. “It was fine. It was just fine until I recently discovered my boss is a little more gay than originally assumed.”</p>
<p>There was a pause on the other end that extended way past what Louis would consider dramatic and then..</p>
<p>”I'm sorry?”</p>
<p>He didn't know whether Zayn was genuinely confused or apologizing for the fact that Louis was having such a shitty day.</p>
<p>”I'm having a meltdown, Z. A major fucking overload and I don't know if I can handle it.” Louis rambled, tugging at his wet hair with his free hand. “This is way, <i>way</i> more than I bargained for!”</p>
<p>”Mate, you need to calm down.” The Bradford boy replied. “What the hell is going on? You sound like you're losing it.”</p>
<p>Louis exhaled heavily, a chuckle punching off at the end. ”I very well fucking might be and if I go down, you're going along with me by association. I will not go down alone, do you hear me?”
</p>
<p>He could hear the eye roll in Zayn's voice but he couldn't help it, this was out of his wheelhouse and he needed the Buddha type wisdom that his best friend so graciously supplied every other time he had a problem.</p>
<p>”What. Is. Happening???” He enunciated and that made Louis' word vomit come back with a vengeance.</p>
<p>”I saw Harry fucking some dude in his studio and I confronted him about it, now I have to go to lunch with him so we can talk about it.”</p>
<p>Zayn paused, the line going dead silent. “He was with a dude and you saw it?”</p>
<p>Louis threw off his towel, pinning the phone between his shoulder and his cheek, while he pulled on a pair of navy blue briefs.</p>
<p>”Sort of?” He said, noticing how unsure he sounded, even while surveying his ass in the full length mirror on the wall. Louis shook his head to clear his thoughts. “I mean, yeah I did. I saw him having sex with one of the guys he's working with in his studio. I really don't know how to deal with this, Zayn. I'm freaking out. Got any wisdom for me?”</p>
<p>”I think you need to ask yourself why exactly this is bothering you so much, first of all.” Zayn pointed out.</p>
<p>He really didn't like the lilt in Zayn's voice or the way this conversation was suddenly headed. Sighing, he pulled out a pair of jeans and a graphic tee from his wardrobe.</p>
<p>”What do you mean?” <i>That's right, play dumb. There's no way he knows.</i></p>
<p>Of course he forgot Zayn knew him like the back of his hand. Like every tattoo he'd ever gotten. Like every single street in their small little home town. </p>
<p>Zayn sighed exasperatedly. “Louis, you like this guy. I wouldn't be surprised if you're freaking out because you are scared what that means for you two in the future.”</p>
<p>”Mate, there is no me and Harry and there never will be. I don't like him, I barely know him.” He surveyed his nails in what he thought was an uninterested manner even though Zayn couldn't see him. <i>There we go.</i> “Besides this didn't really bode well in his favor, did it?”</p>
<p>”Perhaps not but what if he explains things and its actually good?” Zayn paused for effect. 
</p>
<p>
  <i>Asshole.</i>
</p>
<p>”What happens if what he has to say changes your mind? You're treading on dangerous territory, Lou. I heard you the first night you called me. Your attraction to this guy is clearly there.”</p>
<p>Louis grunted as a response, choosing to ignore what was said. He could control himself. It was all about willpower and he had loads when he was determined. If he couldn't use Harry being straight as an excuse to stay away, Cassie sure was the next best thing. As well as respecting the whole marriage thing.</p>
<p>”What if he's attracted right back to you?” Zayn inquired, shifting focus of the conversation. “What would you do or say then?”</p>
<p>”Z, while I appreciate the inquisition about this, I think I can survive without giving in to temptation. I mean, Cassie is still here even if Harry's straightness disappears. I would never want to do that to her.”</p>
<p>”You called me, dude, i'm just saying.” the other man muttered, unimpressed.</p>
<p>Louis' fondness for Zayn came flooding into him all and once and his eyes turned a little wet. He really did love this utterly, insufferably perfect human being. He wasn't even a best friend, he was family for tolerating him and all of his bullshit on a regular basis. There's not many people who could keep up with him, let alone deal with his bitching. Zayn was just one of those special people that come around once in a lifetime.</p>
<p>He sighed. ”Thank you, love. I really appreciate you talking to me and helping me out of my little spiral.”</p>
<p>Zayn chuckled. ”Well, I just don't want you getting hurt by anything or anyone. I hope this guy is straightforward with you and everything goes okay or Ill beat his ass.”</p>
<p>”Love you, darling. Ill talk to you later.” Louis replied, hanging up after the other male bid him goodbye.</p>
<p>He felt a little better after his talk with Zayn but faced with his impending lunch date with Harry, his nerves were still ever present and showing around the edges. His hands were shaking the longer he waited. It gave him time to actually mull over the wiser man's words from before.</p>
<p>What really would happen if Harry was ever attracted to him too? Would he be strong enough to resist something like that? Even if he could explain what he was doing and make it make sense, Louis had never been one to be a homewrecker. He'd also grown to care for Cassie quite a bit and knowing what it was like to grow up without a father, he could never take away the home life that she's accustomed to. Even if it wasn't much of a life.</p>
<p>It occurred to him he was getting a little ahead of himself though. He still hadn't heard Harry's side of things. Its entirely possible his explanation was stupid just like every other man's excuses were.</p>
<p>A knock on the door disturbed him from his thoughts, though, followed by Harry poking his head through the door. He looked a little bit more put together now. He was wearing a blue button up shirt that he'd probably forgotten to do up all the way as his chest was showing a little, which was rude. He also was clad in dark skinnies and brown sued boots. It was a look Louis didn't expect, it was so casual but he had to remember this wasn't a date, and he should have been pissed off. Harry pulled it all off, of course. A pair of sunglasses were perched on top of his artfully put together curls, completing the look quite well.</p>
<p>Louis was staring, mouth open. He was embarrassing.</p>
<p>”Hey.” was all that Harry said, seeming to come with his own nerves.</p>
<p><i>'As well he should.'</i>Louis thought.</p>
<p>”Hi.” Louis said weakly, his anger having dissipated. “Are you ready, then?”</p>
<p> The older man nodded, leaning on the doorknob with his hand. “Whenever you are.”</p>
<p>Louis stood, tucking his phone into his front pocket, and following Harry out of the room.</p>
<p>---------</p>
<p>The car ride was awkward but that was to be expected. They were both silent as Harry drove, his hands were squeezing the steering wheel a bit as Louis noticed his knuckles were white. He didn't even bother asking where the hell they were going.</p>
<p>They drove for a while and ended up going to some hole in the wall little diner tucked away in the streets that looked like it hadn't been visited by anyone in modern ages. Nature was reclaiming the building slowly, the outer brick walls were covered in green but that is what Louis decided made it charming. The one thing Harry had said as they walked to the door was that he had discovered it shortly after he and Kendall had gotten married and moved to London. It was one of his favorite places to go when he needed to get away from the chaos that was life, as he put it.</p>
<p>The inside was even more charming.</p>
<p>It was a smaller place and to Louis' surprise there were actually more people there than he expected there to be but not in the normal standard of your usual diners. A man was sitting at the worn down, beige and wooden counter sipping on his coffee leisurely and there were two girls in the first booth on their left. Only two waitresses were walking around the whole place, both wearing turquoise uniforms with white aprons, both with kind eyes, grey hair, and even kinder smiles.</p>
<p>The booth's separating walls were all wooden but the seats were decorated with turquoise leather to match the uniforms. Everything was aged and a lot of the material was ripped on the seats but they still looked pretty nice. Various records and pictures of older artists like Elvis and Johnny Cash covered the walls, some even signed. What interested him most were the pictures of what looked like two girls who traveled the world, seeing the Eiffel tower, the Colosseum, or at least what was left, and the Statue of Liberty. Louis assumed it was the two waitresses displaying their lives proudly.</p>
<p>”Ethel, nice to see you.” Harry called out, taking his sunglasses off the top of his head and hanging them in his shirt.</p>
<p>”Excuse me, where is my greeting? I know I don't just stand here and look pretty.” Said one of the women, her hair pulled up into a tight bun, glasses perched on her nose as she surveyed Harry disappointed.</p>
<p>Harry just chuckled, walking forward to embrace her, kissing her on the cheek. “Alice, you know that I was going to say hello to you next.”</p>
<p>Alice surveyed him skeptically but then a smile spread upon her face. She pinched Harry's cheeks with her fingers. “Oh i'm just teasing you, darling. I know you would. Just wouldn't mind being first now and again.”</p>
<p>Louis observed them and noticed Harry was looking at her with amusement but with every hint of adoration his expression could manage. It wasn't fair. It was already melting the ice wall he'd built around his heart on the way over here.</p>
<p>Another woman approached the two of them, her hair shoulder length and wavy, her bright blue eyes fixing on Harry as she kissed him as well. ”Oh you miserable old cow, just because he says my name first doesn't mean he loves you any less.”</p>
<p>Alice looked offended but as soon as Ethel had relinquished Harry and sidled up to her, she was smiling brightly again.</p>
<p>”Well excuse me, my love but our surrogate grandson needs to appreciate both of his grannies. Its been far too long.”</p>
<p>While Ethel elbowed Alice in the side, Louis froze. Were these two women together?</p>
<p>When Harry noticed Louis standing to the side, he moved back over to him, bringing him closer. “I know its been a very long while and i'm sorry, I will try harder to visit but Alice, Ethel, this is Louis.”</p>
<p>Louis noticed Ethel's gaze flicker to Harry's, a slightly quirking eyebrow before she turned her attention to him.</p>
<p>”Louis, eh?” She started, giving him a once over. <i>Okay.</i></p>
<p>”Yes, ma'am.”</p>
<p>Alice rolled her eyes. “Oi with all this ma'am stuff, ill be feeling 85. Just Alice and Ethel is fine, love. Don't be shy. Now, go on and have a seat and we will be over in a bit.”</p>
<p>Harry nodded, guiding Louis to a boot in the back of the restaurant, likely away from prying ears.</p>
<p>
  <i>Oh god.</i>
</p>
<p>”Alice and Ethel have been running this place since the 50s and they've become kind of a second family.” Harry started. “They're the only ones who know the truth besides my mum.” 
</p>
<p>Louis' head tilted slightly, confused. <i>The truth?</i></p>
<p>”So I told you that i'd explain to you what's going on and I will.” Harry sighed, resting back against the booth seat, his arms stretched out in front of him. “It starts when I was sixteen, really. I tried out for the X Factor because I loved music and I really wanted to be a singer. It was the one hobby that made me happy so my sister Gemma told me that I should try out.”</p>
<p>He paused and Louis nodded just to show him that he was listening intently.</p>
<p>”I made it through but toward the end, I lost. I came in third and I thought that was the end of it.” The older man inhaled, smiling a bit, a flush on his cheeks. “I was a wreck afterwards. I was crying when I got eliminated but then Simon Cowell asked me to sign with him and his company. I was so fucking excited I could hardly stand it. I mean, what sixteen year old wouldn't want a record deal and to be a famous solo artist? It was going well for a while but they kept wanting to push this reputation on me that I didn't want.”</p>
<p>Harry's jaw clenched as he thought about it and Louis could feel the tension wafting off of him in waves.</p>
<p>”They tried to make me into a womanizer, a sex symbol. I hated it. Here I was, I wasn't even having sex, I was still a virgin, but they wanted to make it sound like I was sleeping with all these girls.” He scoffed, shaking his head, rubbing at his eyes. Louis already felt shitty for him.</p>
<p>”When I turned seventeen and was fresh off of my first album and tour, they told me that I would probably need to be in a PR relationship to help sales for the next album that I was writing. They said it was normal and natural but I had absolutely no interest in being with a girl. That was a little odd for me considering how many were trying to hook up with me, but I didn't look into it.”</p>
<p>Louis was pretty sure he could see where this explanation was going but this sounded like a part of Harry that he didn't release to many people so he didn't want to be that asshole who makes assumptions based on only one part of the story, so he decided to let the man continue to let it all out.</p>
<p>”I was set up with Kendall not long after that. She was an up and coming model and I had my album to promote so it worked out for both of us.” He shrugged. “I thought it would be okay for a while. She was rather nice and we had fun on our outings. The attention with our relationship really helped our careers as well.”</p>
<p>He stopped talking when Ethel made her way over to their table with a tea for each of them along with menus. He was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to eat and he said as much, the other man shaking his head as well. She walked away with a pat of Harry's cheek and a grin, allowing Harry to continue his explanation.</p>
<p>”Anyway,” Harry continued, “I had gotten a manager at this time. His name was Jeff Azoff and he was damn smart. He suggested that I propose to Kendall about 6 months after we'd signed the contract.” Harry swallowed hard, squeezing his eyes shut. “When I refused, I was reminded I couldn't. Being a kid at that time, It should have been easy to say no. However, my mum not knowing much about the music industry, I trusted Jeff to know what I was doing and if it was the best thing for me. Well, my contract had quite the snuck in clause I couldn't break no matter how hard I tried. So, I proposed to this girl at 17 fucking years old.”</p>
<p>Louis' breath caught in his throat, having to clear it straight after. Were the people in Harry's life so money hungry they'd force him to do something he didn't want to do? Something that he was too young for? It made him sick to think about.</p>
<p>“It was way too much, too soon but I didn't exactly hate Kendall and I was mostly in denial of a lot of things, so we had a pretty good marriage at first even if we were young. They said the controversy of a young marriage would open a lot of doors for us. Well, she got pregnant a couple months in and then, Cassie was born. I remember the day like it was yesterday, honestly.” He trailed off, smiling at nothing in front of him, no doubt remembering holding Cassie in his arms.</p>
<p>”Not long after Cassie though, I started drifting away from Kendall.. sexually. I was looking more at guys. I was scared as hell about having to confront these feelings that wouldn't go away. About two years after my daughter was born I realized that I actually wanted nothing to do with women anymore. It was a shock to my system, you know? I didn't get to experiment, to look at my feelings and discover if any of them were different than the norm because everyone kept telling me that I had to be with a girl and eventually i'd convinced myself that was the truth too.” Harry's smile was replaced with a sour look. “Kind of ironic considering all the guys in my life are now closet cases or gay.”</p>
<p>”So I discovered entirely too late that I am in fact attracted to men. I'm sorry that you got tangled up in it, Louis. Seeing as how I am married, I tend to keep my affairs with men more discreet and it must have been quite the shock to see me with Aiden. Honestly, I didn't plan on sleeping with him but it just kind of happened.” He looked at Louis finally, a sheepish smile taking over his features.”I was forced into my marriage but I don't want to break my family. I want my daughter to have a better life than I did. I feel like if I were to come out and divorce Kendall, she wouldn't have that.”</p>
<p>Louis exhaled a breath he didn't know he was holding. “All due respect, Harry, I think she'd just be happier if you or Kendall weren't working constantly. I think she feels neglected by both of you.”</p>
<p>”You're probably right about that, as well. I tend to throw myself in my work as a way to distract from my fucked up life.” He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I really don't mean to be such a shit dad. I've put myself in this place and she shouldn't suffer for it.”</p>
<p>Louis couldn't help but feel sympathetic. It really all did make sense now.”Well, if you ever need someone to talk to about your shitty life, you can come to me.”</p>
<p>”So, does that mean you're not mad anymore?” Harry inquired, hopefully.</p>
<p>Louis could see it lighting up in his eyes and he automatically felt disarmed. If he thought about it, it really wasn't Harry's fault. This wasn't like any of the situations that he'd ever dealt with before. If he had a choice, he was sure that the man wouldn't be in this situation at all but he was staying for his daughter.</p>
<p> That was admirable. Albeit a little unfair, because he deserved to be happy too and he was sacrificing that. It made him feel bad for being angry.</p>
<p>Louis shrugged his shoulders. ”I'm not mad anymore, no. I actually kind of understand. I just feel bad that you're kind of stuck in this.”</p>
<p>”I'm not really stuck, per se. I'm choosing to live this life for the sake of my daughter.” Harry took a large sip of the tea in front of him, shrugging back at Louis. “My life without a father, even if I had a stepfather, it kind of sucked. A broken home almost broke me at one point. I hate the idea of Cassie growing up and having to be bounced between me and Kendall all the time and having to get to know step parents. Great as they could be, Its no way a kid should live.”</p>
<p>”You make even the most intense level of closeting i've ever seen make sense. How is that possible?” He shook his head, having not even touched any of his tea. Frankly, he had forgotten it was even here.</p>
<p>The last week had been way too much for Louis' emotions but obviously Harry trusted him enough to tell him what few people knew. Otherwise, they wouldn't be here right now. He would have kept up on the denial or refused to even tell him anything. It wasn't like this man owed him an explanation anyway, not really.</p>
<p>He had to say, though that he was really glad they'd had this conversation, however one-sided it may have been. It was more of a venting session for Harry but it seemed like it lifted all the previous tension off of his shoulders the further in the story he had gotten till there was nothing left.</p>
<p>”So,” Harry started, his fingers tapping against the worn wood of the table. “Now that we've gotten that out of the way and you've heard practically my entire saga, how about you tell me about you?”</p>
<p>Louis flushed slightly, directing his gaze down to his abandoned tea cup, running his finger around the rim. “What do you want to know?”</p>
<p>He noticed Harry tracking the movement of his fingers, watching him with an intense expression on his face. Louis couldn't identify what specific emotion was flickering in those green eyes but then again, he was sure that after the emotional story he'd gone through, Louis didn't want to know right now.</p>
<p>“I want to know what you want to tell me.” Harry spoke, running his tongue across his bottom lip. A movement that definitely didn't catch his attention. No fucking way.</p>
<p>“I feel like we are horribly imbalanced now.”</p>
<p>He tried to search his brain but all it could come up with was useless facts about himself that weren't interesting. It was not because Harry was distracting him. It was just because there was really nothing interesting about him. He was a guy from a normal neighborhood and he hadn't really done anything extraordinary.</p>
<p>”Uh..” Louis started, “I don't really know what to tell you. I'm from Donny but we moved here to London, me and my mum, when my dad left-”</p>
<p>Harry made a sound, swallowing the sip of tea he took. ”Your dad too, huh? Maybe we can form a deadbeat dad, club.”</p>
<p>He nodded. “Yeah he left a few weeks after I was born. Wasn't really interested in doing the dad thing, I guess. I'm lucky, though. Instead of having to keep my namesake my first stepdad allowed me to take his last name.”</p>
<p>At that moment, Alice chose to make her way over to them, fresh tea in her hands. She obviously knew Louis hadn't touched his but since he was less nervous, he was actually grateful for it. She took the used cups, afterwards, winking at Louis before she walked away.</p>
<p>Louis saw fascination take the place of whatever emotion had occupied Harry before. “What was your name supposed to be before this?”</p>
<p>”Louis Troy Austin.” Louis muttered, cringing at his given name. He was so fucking glad Mark had come along. He sounded like a bad porn actor. Another thing to dislike his sperm donor for.</p>
<p>Upon seeing Harry trying to hold in a laugh, he scoffed, turning red.</p>
<p>”You know what? I regret telling you now.” Louis crossed his arms against his chest, pouting.</p>
<p>”I'm sorry, Lou.” Harry gasped out, tampering out his laugh when he saw the other male pouting. “Oh come on, you have to admit that name is a little funny.”</p>
<p>He tilted his head to the side, as if considering it.”Nope you're still an ass.”</p>
<p>Harry stuck his tongue out at him, pressing his thumb to his nose, his fingers wiggling in a type of face Louis' sisters would do if they were mad at him. It was kind of endearing. As if he wasn't having enough trouble trying to squash the fluttering in his stomach from all Harry's attention being on him and seeing him happy.</p>
<p>
  <i>God damnit.</i>
</p>
<p>”What's your name now, then? I'm sure its loads better.” Harry asked, breaking him out of his reverie.</p>
<p>”Louis William Tomlinson.” He replied, his voice having gone quieter. What, suddenly he was shy? He didn't get himself anymore.</p>
<p>Harry's grin grew. “Well now that's much better. Sound like a proper royal, don't you?”</p>
<p>Louis flushed even further, a question burning in the back of his mind. To shift the attention off of him, he decided to chance it. “What happened to your singing career?”</p>
<p>Caught off guard with the shift in topic, Harry chuckled. “Um, when I married Kendall, I tried to keep it going. I did a few concerts. Jeff wanted me to do a tour but by then, I had found out she was pregnant and I wanted to be here for her. I did mostly local stuff and interviews but after Cassie was born, I decided I didn't want to be one of those dads that spends a couple weeks with his family then takes off again on tour for months. I didn't want my daughter to be raised without the stability of two parents.” He paused, licking his lips.</p>
<p>“Of course, not that single parents and the like can't be a good atmosphere for a child but I didn't want to be like my dad and I felt like having this career, I would have been. So instead of being a singer, I was a songwriter for a while, working in studios with artists. It was actually Ed Sheeran who encouraged me to produce. I helped  him with a track and he loved it.” Harry shrugged, a bit of his bashful side showing through. Obviously he didn't name drop often. “Said i'd be good at it so I had a mate who hooked me up with time to do stuff and then I made my own studio. The rest is history.”</p>
<p>”Do you ever think about, you know, trying again?” Louis asked.</p>
<p>Harry shook his head, his lips pursing slightly. “Nah. I mean, I would love to be involved in music in that way again but for now, i'm perfectly happy as a producer with my own company. It took a while to get Styles Productions off the ground, so I tend to try to be grateful with what I have.”</p>
<p>Louis took a sip of his tea, remaining silent while contemplating his answer. Even through Harry's shitty experiences in the music industry, he wasn't letting it keep him away from music altogether. He'd just found other ways to cope and he admired the man for that. There were plenty things that'd been ruined for him that he couldn't take a second look at again whether by his father, a stepfather, or a friend that he'd lost. To have the strength that Harry had to deal with all this shit and keep kicking was something he strove to.</p>
<p>”Penny for your thoughts?” Harry spoke, breaking him out of his thoughts, amusement curling at his lips.</p>
<p>Louis shook his head, placing his tea cup down on the saucer. “I was just thinking about all the things i've given up because they've been ruined by other people.”</p>
<p>”Like what?”</p>
<p>”Like drama. I wanted to go to uni for acting or for teaching drama after school but my step dad thought it wasn't manly enough and neither did a lot of my peers seeing as how I was ruthlessly tortured and called 'gay boy' until I dropped out of the class.” He sighed, feeling the sadness and disappointment creep into the edges of his thoughts. He really did miss it. “Its hardly as messed up as what you've gone through but its something I wanted to make a career out of. It meant a lot to me.”</p>
<p>Harry's eyes softened sympathetically. “I'm sure you could still do it. You shouldn't give up on that stuff. If its going to make you happy, then its worth it.”</p>
<p>”I took a gap year because I was scared to go to Uni. I didn't know whether or not i'd still be able to do it seeing as how my step dad is still funding my education.” Louis replied, sucking on his lower lip, collecting his thoughts. “I suppose its only because he feels an obligation to it seeing as how he's practically adopted me but I just wish he would realize its me who has to sit through this crap. I wanna do what I wanna do.”</p>
<p>”Maybe you should talk to him about it. Try to make him see your side?”</p>
<p>Louis laughed, pressing his fingers against his lips when he realized it was a little too loud for where they were. “Harry, your optimisim is refreshing but i've never been able to talk to Mark about anything.”</p>
<p>It was Harry's turn to sigh now. ”I'm sorry. You deserve to have the future you want, Louis. From what I know, you're a bright guy, you're funny, and you'd kill it as whatever you want to be. Now, I would like to know more about you if that's okay. I don't think we covered much.”</p>
<p>Louis grinned, feeling the butterflies in his stomach take flight, bumping into his internal organs. He took a deep breath to calm himself, making it so he was able to speak.</p>
<p>He told Harry about his life with his sisters, about Zayn and their many adventures, legal or otherwise, and about all the classes that he'd taken in his last year. He told him about how he'd failed maths for three years until he was hooked up with a tutor that helped him get through the last year plus make up everything he'd failed. Louis made it clear he wasn't going to answer questions alone so he cycled through all the boring ones; favorite movie, favorite color, favorite music and artist, all of which he got answers to, happily.</p>
<p>While Louis found himself quite partial to Red and other colors on that particular spectrum, Harry was fond of the color blue, noting that his eyes were about the shade he liked.</p>
<p>He pointedly ignored the feeling his stomach swirled with while Harry recited his favorite music. Most of it was music Louis had avoided like the plague because of his sisters but they also had a lot of music in common, like Ed Sheeran, Arctic Monkeys, and Kings of Leon.</p>
<p>When they'd run out of things to talk about and had fallen into a comfortable silence, Harry broke it after a few moments. “I suppose we should be heading back though, yeah?”</p>
<p>Spending all this time with him had Louis a little disappointed and hesitant to go back home. They'd shared things with each other that no doubt they hadn't shared with anyone else. He had certainly told Harry things he didn't even tell Zayn. It wasn't as if it was really important information nor was it that he didn't want to tell his best mate, some of the things just never came up between them.</p>
<p>”I suppose we can go back.” Louis replied, unable to keep the disappointment hidden from his voice. When Harry smirked, he rolled his eyes. “What?”</p>
<p>Harry tilted his head to the side. ”Do you not want to go?”</p>
<p>”I- Its not that!” he stumbled. “I was just enjoying this but you're right, we should get back.”</p>
<p>Louis stood up from the booth, digging in his pocket. When Harry held out a hand, he paused.</p>
<p>”Don't you dare. I've got it. I'm the one who dragged you out here.” 
</p>
<p>Harry dug out his wallet, laying down a fifty, throwing it on the table. It was a lot more than their couple of teas probably cost but knowing his relationship with the women who ran the place, it wasn't surprising. For some reason, it made Louis' heart warm a little.</p>
<p>”Besides,” the man continued, leading him out of the diner. “You've got to prepare for attack of the cougars next week.”</p>
<p>Louis paused outside the door of the diner, blinking over at the asshole with the smug smile on his face.</p>
<p>”I'm sorry, what?”</p>
<p>Harry chuckled. “Get in, i'll tell you all about it at home.”</p>
<p>Against his better judgment, he climbed back into the range rover Harry drove around. He was unsure just what the hell he'd meant by his previous statement but whatever it was, he could tell it was probably something he definitely wasn't prepared for.</p>
<p>-------</p>
<p>When they'd made it home and stepped through the front door, Louis found himself with a little girl attached to his legs.</p>
<p>”Lou Lou! You're back!” She said cheerfully, digging her head into his stomach, hugging his waist now. “Where were you?”</p>
<p>Louis didn't know whether to be flattered by her excitement or feel bad that she probably thought he'd left and wasn't coming back.</p>
<p>”I stole him!” Harry answered before he could, gathering the little girl up into his arms.Cassie's answering giggle made him feel a little bit better.</p>
<p>”Daddy, Louis is my babysitter. You can't have him!” Her statement was cut off at the end with more giggles as the man was poking her in the sides and tickling her silly. He lifted her up higher, dangling her over his shoulder, upside down. “Get- Get your own!”</p>
<p>Louis really just couldn't resist. He stepped forward and started tickling Cassie's stomach, himself, causing her to squeal and kick her legs above Harry's head. ”Sharing is caring little girl. Me and your daddy are friends now.”</p>
<p>Harry put her down after a while, back on her feet. She stood in front of them, her hands on her little hips. “But I saw you first, so I get first dibs.”</p>
<p>He nodded, grabbing the little girl's shoulders, moving to tickle her neck. She dodged him though, sliding out from his grip and running back into the living room where she had been watching cartoons.</p>
<p>”I've gotta borrow him for a bit more, Cass.” Upon her look of disappointment, Harry continued. “I have to prepare him for the chaos that is your dance class since they'll be here next week.”</p>
<p>Cassie squeaked, barreling forward into Harry's waist this time, hugging him with a tight grip. “Thank you, daddy!” She pulled back, waggling her finger up at her dad. “I suppose you can borrow Louis, but only for five minutes. Exactly.”</p>
<p>She ran back into the living room, plopping down on the couch, her attention focusing on the television again. Louis watched her for a few moments, a fondness seeping deep into his veins. He loved this little girl with all his heart already. How was that even possible? Especially this fast? She was like a part of his family he didn't know was missing.</p>
<p>”Louis?” Harry whispered, grabbing his attention, and nodding towards the kitchen door. “Ill tell you what to expect away from my little goober's prying ears.”</p>
<p>The fondness must have been evident in his features because as soon as Harry had really focused on him to speak to him, his gaze softened around the edges. Like he knew his daughter was drawing him in just as she'd drawn this man in the day she was born. She was just magnetic that way.</p>
<p>Louis nodded, following him slowly into the kitchen. It was just then that he had remembered what Harry said to him outside the diner. <i>Cougars?</i>
</p>
<p>”What exactly is it that you meant by preparing for cougars?” He asked hesitantly, taking a seat at one of the stools while Harry dug in the fridge for a drink.</p>
<p>After exiting, water bottle in hand, his face was more amused than anything. It was a trait about Harry that really made him want to punch him. He refrained however, becoming distracted when the man opened the bottle of water, chugging some of it down. The way his adam's apple bobbed with every swallow really shouldn't have been as attractive to Louis as it was. He was crazy. Absolutely fucking insane.</p>
<p>”Well, the kids are great but the mums that tend to come here, they're quite..” He trailed off, tapping his fingers on the marble of the counter. “Friendly..I've had to remind them more than once that i'm married to Kendall and that i'm definitely too old for boytoy status.”</p>
<p>Louis blinked, rubbing a hand over his face. “What does that have to do with me?”</p>
<p>Harry smiled, the cavern in his cheek on full display. He wanted to lick it but those were thoughts for another time. Preferably moments when he was alone in his bedroom.</p>
<p>”Well, Louis you're young and you're hot. I'm pretty sure they'll try to eat you up.”</p>
<p> Louis was almost too lost in his own little world, daydreaming about the man in front of him that he almost missed the compliment his boss had afforded him. It made him burn right down to his toes and his face was burning along with it.</p>
<p>”Did you just call me hot?” He asked, voice shaking slightly, but his eyes were narrowed, a smirk curling at his lips. It was like he was catching Harry in some illicit practice. Of course, he'd already done that.</p>
<p>This time, though, the attention was focused on him and he wasn't sure what to do with that. Not at the moment. The day had been charged with emotion and this was one emotion he didn't need to add to the list. For either of them, really.</p>
<p>Harry leaned on the counter, his torso angling closer to him “And what if I did? Its not like its a lie, is it?”</p>
<p>Louis hummed. ”I think you might be the only person who has ever called me hot besides Zayn. He's obligated to say that though or i'd punch him in the balls.”</p>
<p>”You're hot, Louis, and you damn well should know it.”</p>
<p>When their eyes met, he was met from one of the most deeply intense gazes he'd gotten from Harry yet. It was like he was trying to instill this mind frame in him with his own thoughts, transferring them from one place to another. Fraying around the edges though, felt like small notes of desire and jealousy. Jealousy about what, he wasn't even sure, but the desire was what had his brain short circuiting and his heart beating just the little bit harder.</p>
<p>Harry made his way slowly around the counter and alarm bells should have gone off in Louis' head but they were being drowned out by the flapping of butterfly wings in his stomach and the steady but rough beating of his heart in his ears.</p>
<p>They hadn't broken their gaze the whole time and by the time the other man had come close enough, Louis' body unconsciously turned towards Harry. It was like a planet and its moon coming together in their orbits. Like a flower that turned towards the sun to suck up the energy and light. He was so cloudy in his brain that his limbs felt heavy. He felt like he was rooted to this spot but he felt good so despite what the consequences of whatever was happening right now were, he couldn't be assed to care.</p>
<p>”I don't know what the guys you've been around are like but they're clearly idiots.” Harry began, his voice just above a whisper as he stood about a foot away from Louis. This was a bad idea. “You're beautiful, Louis. Please don't let anyone tell you differently, not even yourself.”</p>
<p>Louis meant to respond but the words got caught in his throat as Harry reached up to to fix an unruly part of his fringe, his knuckles of his index and middle fingers sliding down his cheek shortly after. It felt like electricity zapped through his skin, the hair standing up on his arms.</p>
<p>He definitely couldn't breathe but if this was how he was supposed to go, he couldn't find it in him to mind. With this man in his space, he felt relaxed. He felt happy and on top of the world. What a way to go.</p>
<p>As if noticing the moment was becoming a little too intimate for their interactions, Harry snapped out of his daze, clearing his throat. He backed away, making his way around the counter again to put his water bottle away.</p>
<p><i>Come back.</i> His insides were screaming.</p>
<p>Louis just wanted one more touch. Even if it was going to have to last him a lifetime, just one. The spell that was cast over them just now, it was so thick but felt so good. It wrapped around them like a warm blanket. He never wanted it to go away but he couldn't do it. He wasn't selfish. He knew Cassie's needs came before his own desires, so he tried to clear the fog in his mind.</p>
<p>”Thank you.” Was all he could really come up with, his voice strained with the effort it took not to pull Harry back in and press their bodies together.</p>
<p>Harry smiled, a bit awkwardly, and nodded. “I'm sorry. I get a little intense sometimes, I guess. Being vulnerable and sharing a lot of deep things tends to get me in my own head about things.”</p>
<p>Louis shook his head, shrugging. “Its okay, the emotions are pretty high right now.”</p>
<p>”Well either way, I'll probably be here when the dance class comes over. I'll try to protect you from all the lecherous women.” The man offered, placing a new bottle of water in front of Louis.</p>
<p>”Thanks a lot.” He said sarcastically, not at all excited for this dance class anymore. Louis grabbed the water, taking a drink. “Maybe telling them I am a huge homo would help.”</p>
<p>Harry snorted. ”I dunno how far that will get you. I'm pretty sure that they'd try to convert you, anyway.”</p>
<p>The teen groaned, rolling his eyes. “I guess we will have to see what happens, won't we?”</p>
<p>”You'll be fine.” The older male said, starting to walk towards the exit. “I should probably go work, though. Get some things done so I will be able to be up here with you guys when they're here.”</p>
<p>”I should probably go check on Cassie anyway.” Louis followed him out and while Harry disappeared, he wandered into the living room where the six year old was sitting in front of the coffee table, drawing.</p>
<p>”Hey you, what are you doing?” He said, sitting on the floor between the couch and table, right next to Cassie.</p>
<p>”Drawing.” she answered, not tearing her eyes away from the tv.</p>
<p>Louis nodded even though she really wasn't paying attention to him. Honestly, he was grateful for that. It gave him time to mull over the day's events.</p>
<p>This morning, he was ready to hate Harry for everything he'd discovered but upon learning his reasoning, the hatred and anger completely vanished. If anything, their little trip to the diner brought them so much closer which was good and bad.</p>
<p>It was good because it made things less awkward with him working in the house and he's gained an amazing new mate. However, with their vulnerability showing, it seemed to make other feelings arise too.</p>
<p>The thing was, it made it harder for him to just see Harry as a friend. It felt like this wasn't one sided either, which was a major down side to this whole thing. The closer they got the harder it was to ignore the fact that there was a kind of static heat between them that felt way more than friendly. Eventually, in his experience, it reaches a boiling point where you either give in to temptation or completely ruin things. Neither option looked too appealing.</p>
<p>Either way it worked out, he'd be hurting Cassie which was something he'd kill to avoid. This little girl was as important to him as his sisters were in the span of a week. They had a connection and he knew with the situation with her parents, he couldn't just leave her alone. Whether he gave in to his desires or got fired, he would be doing that and he couldn't. He was determined not to let these feelings get in the way.</p>
<p>”Lou?” a little voice tore him out of his jumbled up thoughts.</p>
<p>”Yeah, darling?”</p>
<p>She looked down at her picture as if contemplating something. It was another family picture like she'd drawn him earlier but what he assumed was him was standing between Harry and Kendall.</p>
<p>After a few moments, she took a black crayon and scribbled Kendall out in the picture. It left him a bit confused.</p>
<p>”What did you do that for, love?” Louis asked, tucking an unruly curl behind her ear.</p>
<p>”You haven't been here real long. Mommy and daddy fight a lot.” She started, drawing a big red heart over the figure's heads. “Daddy doesn't smile a lot anymore. Since you got here though, he smiles. So i'm happy you're here.”</p>
<p>Louis' stomach swirled and his heart felt warm both at the same time. It was enough to make him want to pass out but he stayed about as conscious as he could be given what Cassie was implying. She may have been only six years old, but she was very smart and aware of what was happening around her, obviously.</p>
<p>”Im glad to be here too.” He mumbled, wondering just what the hell he had gotten himself into with this job.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Bit of a bad ending but I wanted to save the good bits of the story for when my head is clear of this cold.<br/>And trust me.. interesting stuff is coming!</p>
<p>Feel free to leave a kudo or comment!<br/>Even if I dont reply to comments, I do see them and I appreciate them so much. They make me happy and feel like my writing doesn't suck.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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